There is a lot to say but I find it hard to take all the thoughts, emotions and feelings rushing through my head in a gazillion different directions roll them into a ball a throw at this writing space. The thing that perked me up was finding the last entry to be of the same month.


My writing break was exactly a day before ami arrived and today, the day she left in the morning I am writing this new post. Its a consolation. I find my fingers playing to on this keyboard with delight again. Even if the turnover maybe limited it has to be consitent.


I have a new maid, again. I think its number 8 ( a big number... 8th of the ones that lasted a few days)


One of my friends taught me a great lesson today. Of Insensitivity. And I thought I would not know what to write about today..hmmm. The mind works in mysterious ways. I already knew the ground rules.


Dont bother about what people say.


Devil may care attitude mixed with a flat expression.


Place yourself first.


And Relax, Relax, Relax..the world can go to hell!!! I would like to add to this list. And not to be afraid. what will happen will happen. All the rules above may sound unislamic and against the values of the East but the rule that I am adding seems to be logical. Kismet. I consider insensitivity...just a part of it and not the whole a part of it. Maybe its a thought that has fixed itself in my head for just this time and my opinion will change. But for now it seems apt. Being insensitive to what is happening around you, your world maybe falling apart...but you just pick up and go because that is what is expected of you. Nobody will give you a hand.


My innocence might be lost forever.

I have just made qeema and some yakhni for a mutton pullao. The day is melting away fast and soon it will be night. While my pots hobnobbed on my stove, I finished the last pages of 'Forty Rules of Love' by Elif Shafaq, a Turkish writer. On the cover of the book The Times describes it as a 'jewelled, luxurious book' and Independent finds her a 'challenge' to 'Paulo Coelho's dominance'. There is no doubt the book is beautifully written: the proof I finished the book in three sittings with what not going around! And yes there is the ''religion of love philosophy'' which Coelho's books also echo. But some passages did make me question things.
I love the way she describes the episode of how Rumi and Shams met.
Shams meets him in the middle of a bazaar and catches hold of the bridle of his horse. Before anything he wants the respected scholar to dismount and speak as an equal. He puts forward a question 'who is greater the Prophet (P.B.U.H) or the Sufi Bistami?' and then says the Prophet (P.B.U.H) said 'Forgive me, God, I couldn't know thee as I should have, while Bistami pronounced, Glory be to me, I carry God inside my cloak?'
Rumi replies even though it seems Bistami's statement is bigger it is actually not. It is the other way around. He likens God's love to an endless ocean with each human bearing a cup to drink from it. Bistami's vessel was small and a sip of the ocean was enough to satiate him whereas the Prophet (P.B.U.H), the chosen one, had a bigger cup to fill. Elif refers to the Quran then 'Have we not opened up your heart?' Thus the Prophet's (P.B.U.H) cup was widened to a degree that it was 'thirst upon thirst for him'. Even though he (P.B.U.H) said 'We do not know You as we should.' Rumi finds that 'he (P.B.U.H) certainly knew Him as no other did. (The above para has been taken from Elif Shafaq's Forty Rules of Love)


There can be a thousand adjectives to describe the prose. Beautiful, lilting, lyrical, lucid, rapturous, crackling, powerful, effortlessly smooth and easy to read, magical, musical even but I would pick 'what a talented writer..truly God gifted.'
The question in my mind is about sharia. Although it is described as a burning candle by Shams, only to show the way to the destination, can it be abandoned? The journey is indeed more important and the goal the ultimate prize but what of this detail. It cannot be trivial because the Prophet (P.B.U.H) did not abandon it. It is the judgment of who is good and who is bad that can be abandoned. Who are we to judge? This right belongs to Allah alone.